Happy Happy New Year!

Despite the fact that I haven't blogged in ages (oops!)  I feel drawn tonight to put my year in review and my resolutions for next year down on paper.  And since my penmanship is pretty atrocious, I'm going to use digital paper.

My first thought for 2015 is that if you want to move through life in warp speed, have a child.  Somehow my son managed to turn five in 2015.  FIVE.  That's HUGE!  On top of that, he started school.  SCHOOL!  Like REAL school!  How is it possible that the little baby I tried so hard for is now in school?  And next month, he's going to be six.  I might faint.  But I have to admit, he is the coolest five (almost six) year old I know.  He's dealing with celiac disease and the constant food restrictions like a champ.  He's made a ton of friends in school and the teacher said she's pleased to see what a positive example he sets for his new friends.  I couldn't be more proud of him.  Looking forward to 2016 because I KNOW he's going to learn how to read, and I simply CANNOT WAIT.

2015 was the year of the wedding.  Holy weddings.  It started with my best friend's beautiful barn wedding (which I was honored to be a part of), then a friend and former co-worker's seriously cool looking black and white wedding, followed closely behind by a quick island pig roast/lobster bake for my cousin and then ended with a bang at my sister's AMAZING beach-side wedding.  I get to call it AMAZING because I worked my tail off to make sure it was everything she hoped for...and then a bit more. It was a perfect day, with so many cool people and delicious food, and beautiful fire works, and, and, and....  Despite the broken ferry and a major cake fail, it was still a beautiful day and an amazing way to welcome my new brother-in-law to the family.

On the personal front, I attempted NaNoWriMo for the first time.  My conclusion, it was harder than I thought.  I went in knowing that I probably wouldn't be able to finish, 2200 words a day for a goal of 50,000 words written during the month of November.  And I was right, I wasn't able to finish, which was disappointing, but not unexpected due to the fact that I've never attempted to write so much so fast, and that I wasn't at all prepared.  But I won't say that NaNoWriMo was a complete failure.  I wrote more than I've ever written on a single story and I realized that I can't just sit down and write.  I need a plan, an outline, some scene sketches.  It was definitely a learning experience.

So, what is 2016 going to bring?  I don't know.  But I do have some goals.  First and foremost, I want for Ben and I to feel WELL in 2016.  I have felt miserable for the majority of 2015.  Between my stomach, a lack of energy and constant aching in my back, hips and knees, I feel a hell of a lot older than 32 years.  I'm done with it.  Today I spent a small fortune on supplements and vitamins which I HOPE will start healing my stomach so I can finally start to feel better.  And yes, I have a feeling a trip to the friendly gastroenterologist is also on the agenda for 2016.  I'm also going to work on getting Ben in tip-top shape as well.  He's doing well and gaining weight, finally, but I think he could still be doing better, so we're going to try some new belly healing techniques for him as well.  I want to end 2016 feeling great.

My other goal for 2016 is to write.  I suppose I'm starting with this blog post, since it's turned into an essay at this point, but I'd really like to focus on writing fiction.  Probably for no other reason than to see if I can do it, but you never know.  I'm pretty sure there are worse books on Amazon (I think I've read some) than something I could write.  So hey, you never know, maybe in 2016 I will write the next War and Peace.  Or not...

2015 was a pretty spectacular year, can't wait to see what 2016 has in store for us!

A Night with Diana

I have a very small bucket list.  Mainly because I can never seem to find a pen when I want to jot something down that I think I should do.  So it really only contains a few things, like going to Scotland, writing a book, making a successful spongecake...and up until recently, it contained "Meeting Diana Gabaldon" which was actually at the top of the list.

Last night, I crossed it off the list.  (Well, figuratively, still no pens at hand.)  A few months ago the first (and so far ONLY) useful Facebook ad I had ever seen popped up on my newsfeed announcing Diana Gabaldon making an appearance in Portsmouth, NH.  I had been waiting for years, YEARS, for her to make an appearance in New England and since I happened to see that ad before the event sold out, I was able to pick up tickets for myself and my friend Amanda.

If you know me, you will likely have heard me talk about my favorite book series.  I've probably suggested you read them.  And since the show premiered on Starz last fall, I've probably suggested you drop everything and watch it.  I'm passionately in love with these books.  I love the story, I love the history and I love, love, love the characters.  I have read a lot of books (a lot) and very few characters stick with me like Diana's.  I have read the series many, many times and find something new to love every time.  I've read them when I was bored, I've read them when I was happy and I've read them when I was very, very unhappy.  And they never fail to captivate me, usually so much that I am all but useless for the days/weeks it takes me to finish a book or the series.

When I recommended them to my friend Amanda last summer as a good beach read I sent her home with Outlander on a Friday and on the following Thursday when I showed up to work she announced that her husband hated me because she hadn't cooked dinner or done any laundry for the past week because all she had done was read.  I handed her the copy of book two and my deepest apologies to her husband because I knew she would be a goner for the weeks it takes to read all eight books...

So last night Amanda and I took off early from our respective jobs and went to Portsmouth with our copies of Outlander.  We enjoyed a delicious dinner at British Beer Company, visited a cute little Celtic shop and oohed and aahed over the kilt collection and went to the Music Hall with 900 other women to see "Herself" speak.  (Ok, 896 women and 4 men)

It.was.amazing.

(My phone couldn't handle the lights, but that is in fact "Herself" on the stage mere feet away from me)

She is hilarious.  She spent about 30 minutes telling the story of how she came about writing Outlander and began by telling us how she got the football players in her Anatomy and Physiology class to pay attention by announcing a discussion on the history of contraceptives and reciting the following rhyme:


In days of old when men were bold
And condoms weren't invented
We stuck wool cocks upon our cocks
And babies were prevented

That was the general tone for the evening...


After she spoke, a lady from NH PBS interviewed her asking questions about the books, the Starz show and a few audience questions (not my question, unfortunately-I probably put too many hearts on it) about when she is planning on ending the series. (She told the 77 year old audience member to keep taking her vitamins, so I think it might be a while)


After the Q&A, a line formed to have Diana sign books. We had already received a signed copy of her newest paperback so this was an opportunity to have it personalized or have her sign a different book. The line was quite long, but thanks to Amanda (who did NOT cut...merely "merged") we were towards the front and only waited half an hour or so to get her to sign our copies. So much anticipation! In the end I handed my phone off to an "assistant" who took several photos of me while she signed my book.

I feel a poster sized version of this may be necessary.

Our conversation went like this:
Herself: "Hello there (looks at my name on the post it on my book) Kyla, thank you for coming tonight."
Me: "Thank you so much for coming tonight!"
((We smile for my camera, she hands me the book))
Me: "Thank you so much, thanks!"

It was amazing. I seriously floated out of there. While I would have loved to bare my soul to her and tell her how much I love her writing, how important her characters are to me, how many times I've turned to them for escape or comfort of just out of happiness, and how much I just love her...I didn't.

Perhaps next time.... :)

This is me making really creepy eyes at Diana. (I'm so sorry about that Diana, I looked like I was going to eat you.)

This is me watching her write MY NAME on my copy of Outlander!

This is me trying to telepathically communicate with the person holding my phone, "Are you getting this?? She's writing MY NAME!! I'm STANDING NEXT TO DIANA GABALDON!!"

The final product. Pure Awesomeness!

Post signing selfie.

Makin' Bread

We are still putting up a fight against gluten.  It is much harder than you'd think.  Six months gluten free and kiddo is still testing positive for celiac.  While he is MUCH better than before, he's still not healthy yet and hasn't started to heal.  It's very frustrating.  I am beyond diligent when it comes to keeping him gluten free and yet it seems it's not enough.  So I continue to clean and read labels and hope that at some point something will be enough to get my kid healthy.

In the meantime, I've been asked frequently for the bread recipe I've been using.  It took me a long time to get a recipe I like and it's still not perfect, but I'll share should anyone out there want to give it a try.  It must be simple, because I can make it.  I started with this recipe from food.com.  It's a really good french bread recipe as is and I've been able to make it into rolls too so it's pretty versatile.  But I wasn't really happy with it so I made a few tweaks.  So this is MY bread recipe, or at least as it stands for now...

Sandwich Bread

Ingredients

1 cup white rice flour
1 cup brown rice flour
1 cup tapioca flour
2 Tablespoons ground Flaxseed
2 teaspoons xanthan gum
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
2 Tablespoons sugar
1 1/2 cups lukewarm water
2 1/2 teaspoons yeast (1 package)
2 Tablespoons butter (melted) or oil
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vinegar

Directions:

In the bowl of a heavy-duty mixer, place flours, flaxseed, xanthan gum and salt.  Mix together on low or with spoon.  In a small bowl, dissolve sugar in water.  (Water should be about 110-115 degrees-I have had fine results with honey or brown rice syrup in place of sugar)  Gently stir in yeast.  Wait until mixture begins to foam and then add to dry ingredients with butter, eggs and vinegar.  Mix all on high for 3 minutes.  Scrape dough (which will look like batter) into greased bread pan.  Let rise in warm room until doubled in size (25-35 minutes).  Preheat oven to 400 degrees.  Bake for 40-45 minutes.  (Bread is done at 205 degrees if you use a thermometer)  Remove from pan to cool.

This is my current day-to-day bread.  It tastes AMAZING right from the oven, but gets dry quite quickly.  That, unfortunately, is the nature of gluten free bread.  The good news is that it toasts up quite nicely so it can still be used despite being dry.  Also, it can be left out to dry for a day or so and then ground up in a food processor to make awesome gluten free bread crumbs.  Inevitably I will tweak this some more, maybe someday I'll figure out a bread that stays moist for a few days.  If so, I'll be sure to share!

A bit of a "de-bra-cle"

A couple of years ago, for no reason that I can recall now other than perhaps boredom, I measured myself for a bra.  I discovered that, lo and behold, the bras I owned were four inches too large.  Since I had always just bought the smallest size I could find, which was the smallest size most manufacturers make, this posed a bit of a problem.  After a bit of googling I stumbled on a company, with very positive reviews from bra-uthorities like Good Housekeeping, that specialized in bras for petite people, like myself.  Delighted at the prospect of having clothing that actually FIT, I placed an order, slightly less delighted with the cost.  These you will not find in a two pack on clearance at Walmart...no, no my friend, these will cost you dearly.

The box came with an inconspicuous label and I was delighted to discover the enormous difference between a properly fitted bra and one that was two sizes too large.  After counting my pennies for a few months to order another I finally picked one out to add to my meager collection of clothing that actually fits.  I awaited the box anxiously.

In the meantime, my son started playing T-ball.  He loved it and had  a great time, he had a wonderful coach, who happened to be married to a friend of mine.  He also happened to be our mail carrier.

So imagine my delight, and then inevitable dismay when my next package came NOT with the inconspicuous return label but a much larger label announcing to the world, and by default my mail carrier and son's T-ball coach, my recent purchase from "The Little Bra Company."

It's a damn good thing I like the bra.

Party Time!

We celebrated a birthday this past weekend.  My beautiful little baby boy:

Turned FIVE!!!!

I'm still not sure how it's possible that I have a five year old human being that I call my own.  I am unbelievably lucky.  I am also unbelievably lucky at how well he's growing up!  The past five years have been amazing and we've been blessed to float through the terrible twos and horrendous threes with very few battle scars.  Four was a wonderful year as Ben matured and learned how to question, how to be kind and how to recognize how his behavior (and bad behavior!) affects others.  We've also learned that despite having to change his entire diet and give up some favorite foods, Ben is very positive and happy to eat gluten free!  And we're very happy that he's finally starting to feel better!  

So to celebrate turning five, (FIVE!!!) Ben wanted a Lego birthday.  Not surprising.  Ben has been very big into Legos for the past year.  He likes to build and is learning how to make pretty basic structures.  What he really likes is to play with the assembled Legos.  At any given time during the day I can find him making the Ninja Turtle Legos talk to each other, or leading Police Officers in endless pursuit of the bad guys.  He has a ton of Legos, thanks to some smart shopping on his Grammy's part for a stash of used Legos.  I was asked several times leading up to his birthday if I really wanted him to have more Legos and my answer was, of course!  If he wasn't playing with them or seemed to be losing interest I would say no, I've stepped on and vacuumed up enough Legos for one lifetime already.  But he loves them and I love that he gets to use his imagination and some basic engineering skills while playing.  I love that it's not tv or game related.  And I love that he's happy.  So bring on the Legos!

Ben's mini LegoLand

Yellow Balloons + Sharpie = Adorable!

Putting some Legos to good use holding our napkins and silverware!

Needed some gluten free Lego candy for goody bags so made some homemade gummies with fruit juice and gelatin.  Not everybody's favorite candy, but Ben liked them and we had fun making them!

Some handcrafted Lego goody bags made by my mom...

And some handcrafted goodies to go inside!  Made homemade Legoman crayons and a mini-coloring book!

Lunch was homemade gluten free pizza which, surprisingly, everyone ate and enjoyed!  Even the kiddos!  What a relief to be able to let my son eat one of his favorite foods with his friends and not worry about making him sick!  Dessert was gluten free birthday cake which tasted pretty amazing!  I lucked into finding this recipe and have had good luck tweaking it to meet my needs.

I thought making a Lego 5 would be easy.  It was way harder than I thought, but it still came out pretty good.   Thank goodness we found some willing Legomen to hold Ben's candles!

The party was wonderful and Ben was very happy to have friends and family join him.  I am looking forward to the next year and how many more amazing and wonderful things he can learn.  He will start school in the fall and I'm sure we'll be able to watch him grow in leaps and bounds.  I am one lucky mom to have such an amazing kiddo on my hands!

Gluten Free Party Problems.

I don't know if you noticed, but it snowed a bit today.

My husband noticed, since his face froze while snow blowing this afternoon.  I was out there helping too, but my facial hair is a little less substantial and, let's be honest, I was only out there for about 15 minutes before I wimped out.  

This is going to be a busy week.  I will also likely find myself in tears by the end of it.  My baby is turning 5.  5.  FIVE!!!!  How did this HAPPEN???  How is he FIVE?!?!?!  Needless to say I am not handling this well.

So with his party coming this weekend we have been wrestling with a party planning decision.  Ben has asked for pizza to be served at his party for him and his friends.  Since Ben cannot have gluten, this presents us with a decision to make.  I can make only gluten free pizza and force all his guests (kids included) to try out and pretend to enjoy gluten free pizza crust.  Or, I can make a couple gluten free pizzas and order a few regular pizzas from the store down the street.  While the second option sounds like the best and most logical option there is one slight problem with this.  Ben really shouldn't be around ANY gluten.  Even the gluten he's not eating.  If I let the other kids eat regular pizza I run the risk of Ben getting cross contaminated and then possibly quite sick on his birthday.  And that's just not fair.  But, is it fair to expect other adults AND kids to eat pizza that, while not terrible, is quite a bit different than what they're used to?  We've been back and forth over about this for a couple of weeks now.  While I really feel strongly that our house remain a "safe" zone for Ben, I think we are going to have to order a few "alternative" pizzas to serve to our guests.  Also, gluten free pizza crust is expensive and a pain in the balls to work with.  It will make my life easier to order a few pizzas to fill in the cracks.  (And, for the record, Don often orders pizza that he eats at home, but he is very careful about avoiding contact with Ben when he does so.)  So in hopes of avoiding cross contamination on his birthday, all Ben's friends will be under strict hand-washing orders and will have to keep their food away from him.  While this isn't my ideal plan, I think it will work and will make the party enjoyable for Ben and his guests.  If not, well, we'll try again next year!  Lego Pizza Party....here we come!!!

He is Literally Hilarious

From time to time I find myself having to stop and remind myself that my son is only four.  Well, nearly five now, but you get my point.  He's always been a very articulate speaker and asks really good questions for a four year old.  (He's brilliant.  And I am not at all biased.)  But then there are those times where I am reminded that he is VERY literal still.  Sarcasm, jokes, even some imaginative thinking is still beyond him at this point.  It's not to say that he doesn't have an imagination, good grief, the kid has an awesome imagination, it's just that he's still very literal.  Take for example his sound effects.  Onomatopoeia is pretty much beyond him.  If he is mimicking an action the sound effect is usually the action.  IE "Mom, I'm going to get your nose!"  As he reaches for my noise he will say "take" and then move to put my nose on his face and say "put on."  Yup.  That's how Ben rolls.  No "pop" or "rip" or "honk" it's "take."  I'm pretty sure that's normal.  It is weird though...

Another good example are jokes.  I told him the infamous knock-knock joke:

Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana again???

He now assumes that all knock-knock jokes are about fruit.  And punch lines are just beyond him.

Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Grape-banana.
Grape-banana who?
RACE CAR!!!

See what I mean?  He just doesn't get it.  Not even a little.  His little kid brain just doesn't work like that.  Which is fortunate, because it means he can get away with things like this:

This is Ben's Lego invention, a "Poikey-eared Hooker"

Ben:  "Look Mom! I made a poikey-eared hooker!"

Me: "Ummm, what is it?"

Ben: "A poikey-eared hooker.  You know, because it has a hook!"

He's just so damn literal....and it can be pretty hilarious!

New Adventures for 2015

2015 is a new year.  Which means that we can ignore how little blogging I did in 2014 and start fresh.  I really WANT to do more blogging this year, like at least once a week.  Why?  Because I really want to write more, in general.  I'm not saying I'm the world's greatest writer-I'm not-but I'm not terrible either.  The more I write, the easier it becomes, the easier it becomes, the better I get.  Well in theory anyway.  A theory that I really need to put to the test.

With that said, I'm going to blog.

So, as you may or may not know, we have a Golden Retriever.  The dog and I have a love-hate relationship.  It is mostly hate, on both sides, but after nearly 11 years together, we've learned to tolerate each other.  On Friday, I had the pleasure of bringing him to the vet for blood work.  After boosting him in the car (he's a very old man) we made a slip-slidey trek to our vet.  Upon opening the car door I discovered he had no intent on getting out of the car.  Begging, pleading and bribing did not work, so I braced myself and hauled him out of the car.  It wasn't pretty, but he made it out. When we walked in the new lady at the desk asked me to get him to stand on the scale.  While this was a once easy feat, it has been complicated now by the fact that the dog does not like to step on weird feeling surfaces, like the scale, because he's afraid he's going to fall.  After a few minutes of bribing I got him on there.  For a second.  The lady behind the desk did not have much patience for us and said she got his weight.  Since it was a good 10 pounds more than usual I have a feeling she may have fudged the numbers a bit.  Anyway, she took him out back for his blood test while I waited.

Moments later she was back and (fortunately) the dog had behaved himself.  The desk lady gave me a bit of a scowl as she whipped out a lint roller "He's very hairy."

He's a golden retriever.  

"Uh, yeah," I said, "he's pretty hairy."

I paid my bill and left quickly.  As I mentioned, the dog and I have a relationship based mostly on hate.  So while I begged and pleaded with him to jump quickly back in the car, he ignored me and pooped in the parking lot.  And this was not just a poop.  This was an epic poop.  A walking poop that he had clearly been holding for DAYS in anticipation of ruining our trip to the vet.  It wasn't pretty.  And it was in the middle of the damn parking lot.

So, with another heft, I loaded the dog back up into the car. The car for the first time ever, was completely void of grocery bags.  So back into the office I trudged to ask for a poop bag.

The lady scowls at me.

"Hi, my dog pooped in the parking lot, do you have a bag or something I could use to clean it up?  Like a grocery bag or something?"

She sighs and climbs off her seat and offers me a poop bag.

A poop bag the size of a sandwich bag.  Clearly made for chihuahua poop.

I look at the bag.

I look at her.

She frowns.

I look at the bag.

I look at her scowl.

"Thank you!" I said cheerily as I took the sandwich bag from her.

Epic poop.  Sandwich bag.

Needless to say it was a fairly gross endeavor, but damn if I didn't get it all in that miniature chihuahua poo bag.  

There was not an outside trashcan.  And I was NOT going back in with a sack full-FULL-of poo.

It was a rather smelly ride home, which I'm fairly certain the dog enjoyed thoroughly.

**I actually have the best vet's office in the world and they have been nothing but wonderful to me and my pets.  I'm sure I will be able to say the same about this new desk person after we have had a few more interactions.

A New Reality

It has been a beautiful summer.  Perhaps not as hot as it could have been, I for one like to stockpile the feeling of the sun on my skin for the cold winter months when I can't remember what it feels like not to have goosebumps, but a pretty summer nonetheless.  We've made a bunch of trips to the island, spent plenty of weekends relaxing at home, and have tried to make the most of the summer.  I even started a bit of creative writing, which made me surprisingly happy.  I won't say that what I was writing was all that great, but I'm fairly confident it didn't suck, and that's something!  I was interrupted from my writing by an onslaught of bookkeeping duties and just when those were letting up again I've been consumed with something entirely different: figuring out how to keep my kid healthy.

About a month ago Ben starting having some stomach troubles.  It didn't seem severe, he wasn't in a lot of pain, didn't complain that much, but spent an increasingly larger amount of time on the toilet every day.  After force feeding him bananas, probiotics and even cutting dairy out of his diet, we went to see the doctor for some help.  Last Friday we found out that Ben tested positive for Celiac Disease.

I shouldn't have been surprised, but I was.  I still am to be honest.  And as I've researched and read about Celiac my surprise has gone from frustration to horror to sadness to determination.  I've known, sort of, what celiac is since I was just out of high school.  I've actually been tested for it several times, but I don't have it.  I knew that it was essentially an allergy to gluten, something that I, a die hard fan of all things bread related, couldn't possibly comprehend having.  So when I was told Ben has celiac I was not really sure what we were talking about.  Did he actually have celiac, or was it a gluten sensitivity?  Was it something he could outgrow?  Could he still eat small amounts of gluten or did it have to be eliminated entirely?

Our pediatrician was less than helpful, telling us only to stop feeding him gluten.  Fortunately I have good friends and a knowledgeable family who was able to point us in the right direction.  We're getting him a referral to a GI doctor to confirm the test results and hopefully help us figure out how to adopt a gluten free lifestyle.  I've done some reading and realized that celiac is not the same as a gluten sensitivity.  While we all know someone right now that has cut gluten out of their diet, they don't necessarily have celiac disease.  Gluten sensitivities also make people feel pretty crappy so cutting gluten out of their diet makes them feel better.  Celiac disease, however, is an autoimmune disease.  Instead of gluten just making my kid feel crappy, his body actually starts attacking itself causing damage to his intestines.  Obviously, damaging your intestines really isn't a good idea, so the gluten has got to go.  The more I read, the more I discover just how difficult this is to do.  Gluten is in EVERYTHING.  And even if it isn't in it, there's a good chance it's been around gluten.  And, as I've been reading, the longer you stop eating gluten, the more sensitive you can become to exposure to gluten.  Any exposure.  It's mind boggling really.  Depending on how sensitive he is to gluten, we may have to eventually get all gluten out of the house all together, meaning none of us can eat gluten around Ben.

This is NOT what I expected when I took him to the doctors last week to figure out why his stomach was bothering him.  But this is our new reality.  I will be packing his lunches now for the rest of his childhood.  I will be bringing all his food with us when we travel.  When he goes to school he will likely be grouped with the other allergy kids to keep him healthy.  When he goes to friends' houses and birthday parties I will be bringing his food.  I will be that mom.  The one that makes their kid was their hands a zillion times day, feeding him weird things like raw almonds and bread-less sandwiches.  The one that makes him eat granola bars instead of cupcakes and macaroni and cheese that tastes like cardboard.

It really sucks, and it's still very overwhelming.  I know that things could have been worse, much worse.  Celiac disease isn't a death sentence, it isn't something that's going to noticeably affect how he grows and develops.  It is going to change him though and it's not something that he'll ever outgrow or stop being aware of.  There will probably be times when it makes him really sick.  But he will get better and he will learn how to live with it.  And so will I.  I will embrace being that mom.  I will be the best that mom that you've ever seen.  Because my kid is awesome and he WILL be healthy.

Perfection

Today was about as perfect as it gets.  Morning chores indoors, while the air was still a little chilly, and the rest of the day spent outside in the sun.  Perfection.  Ben and I finished planting veggies in the garden, planted some Lily of the Valley in the yard and set up our white-trash patio.  (White trash patio consisting of a beat up picnic table, four decent looking lawn chairs and the grill all artistically arranged in our driveway.  Classy, I know.)  When that was finished we filled the pool.  And of course I'm talking about a kidding wading pool because we obviously aren't classy enough for any other sort.  Ben and his Ninja Turtles has a blast fighting off bad guys in the high seas.  We spent time on the swings, the trampoline and playing Care Bear hide-and-seek.  (Don't ask.  I played Care Bear hide-and-seek and I still can't even tell you what it was.)  We ended the day with hot dogs and turkey burgers on the grill and a few sparklers.  While I won't say that days like today make the long freezing cold winter worth it, I will say that it makes me appreciate the beautiful days more.

Yay for summertime!

School Break!

I made it.  School is finished for the summer.  This was without question one of the most challenging semesters I can remember.  Governmental Accounting was actually less interesting than it sounds, if you can possibly imagine, and the math class I thought would be fairly easy turned out to be a hellish nightmare of "math" that I'm fairly certain is only ever used and practiced in this particular math class.  Example from one of my homework assignments:  "If Christmas is on December 6th, then 8 is an even number."  True or False.  Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.  That's not math.  That's just Hell.

With that said, I still managed to do well in all three classes, but I need a break.

So what do I do when I need a break?  I read.  And what do I read when my favorite author is publishing a new addition to my favorite series?  I read the whole damn series AGAIN because I have a very serious problem.  This is (I think) my fifth time reading Diana Gabaldon's Outlander series from start to finish.  I think there are probably about 6,000+/- pages since each book averages near 1000 pages and there are seven of them.  Not including the series of "short stories" that accompany them, which I likely won't read unless I have time before the June 10th publication date.  I had thought I would just read the first book in the series and then the last book in the series.  But, like I said, I have a very serious problem and I find myself nearly halfway through the third book with no signs of stopping.  Fortunately, my son has become obsessed with Legos and can sit happily for a good hour or so building castles and houses and playing with the little Lego figures.  This makes me feel considerably less guilty about ignoring him while I indulge myself in complete and utter escapism.  Ahhhh, the powers of a good book.

Once I finish the series, and the new release out in a few weeks (and yes, I'm actually contemplating taking a personal day on the release date to I can try to inhale the new book as fast as humanly possible...I have a VERY serious problem), I have quite a few summer projects to tackle.  Mainly, painting the trim around the new windows, which I have managed to put off since November, and cleaning, which I have managed to put off since...well...let's just say it's pretty dusty in here and leave it at that.  Plus we need to squeeze in as much island time as possible while it's beach weather. Summer in Maine is just never long enough to get everything done, especially when your favorite hobby is sitting in the sun reading and not doing the items on your summer project list.

Oh well, it will all get done at some point, especially the reading.  Priorities you know...

Happy Summer!

NIAW 2014

I had been meaning to write a blog for the last couple of weeks.  But I admit it, I'm lazy.  Lazy and also really busy.  But this week is the 25th Anniversary of National Infertility Awareness Week, and that's important enough for me to take a minute and do my part to raise awareness.

Most people who know me well know that my son was conceived through IVF.  It's something I am willing to talk freely about and share my experiences with, now that it's over.  At the time, while we were going through multiple IVF attempts, it wasn't something I talked about or shared.  It was hard to explain and it was hard to handle failure.  I perused online chat rooms and forums for little bits of support, but I didn't have anyone close I could talk to and share my experiences with.  It was a hard, lonely journey.  A journey that I wouldn't wish upon anyone.  Which is why I try to take a few minutes every year during National Infertility Awareness Week to remind people that 1 in 8 people are suffering with infertility.  1 in 8 people want to have a baby, and are struggling to get pregnant.  And, very likely, 1 in 8 people are struggling silently with their emotions because they feel alone.

Educate yourself.  Educate others.  Because someday, someone is probably going to need your support.

Here's my STORY

And here are some other good resources:

RESOLVE 

NIAW 2014

What You Can Do

A Sad Goodbye

It has been a long week.  One that began in Florida and ended at a funeral home.  Bags are still unpacked, homework isn't finished and above of all, we are all saddened by an unexpected passing.

On Monday, Don's grandmother had a heart attack.  Ironically, we had just been talking a few days before about how well she was doing and how fortunate she was to be living on her own in her own home at the age of 88.  Needless to say her passing was unexpected.  I'm not a religious person, and I'm not sure where I stand on divine intervention, but I do know that something must have brought her out to the grocery store that afternoon where she was surrounded by people who called an ambulance when she wasn't feeling well and ultimately kept her alive after she collapsed.  Because of that, we were able to make it home so that Don and his family could be with her when she passed, peacefully and quickly.

She was a tiny lady, but she will be missed in a very big way.  Even from the first time I met her, when I was just dating Don, he told me just to call her Grammy, because everyone did, and he was right.  She was every one's Grammy.  She was everything a grandmother should be, the very definition of grandmother.  Kind and caring, with never (and I mean NEVER) a negative word to or about anyone.  She truly sought to see only the best in everyone, a trait that I admire and wish that I could emulate.  And if there is one thing grandmothers are known for it's spoiling; and Grammy was a champ.  She loved her family and I think every member of it knew, without question, how much they were loved.

Today was the funeral and it was a wonderful goodbye to such a sweet woman.  The place was filled to capacity, and then some, with people who cared for her and wanted to share stories about her.  It was beautiful and moving and sad.  She will be missed by many.  And I am one of the many.

Two Hours Later...

I know, I know, everyone is bitching about the snow.  But it took me TWO hours to get home from work tonight.  TWO HOURS.  That's two hours of listening to the smack and screech of the windshield wipers covered in ice scraping over the windshield, also covered in ice.  That's two hours of driving with the window down because the heat has to be BLASTING in order to keep the windshield from completely freezing over.  Which didn't even work, by the way.  Two hours of cold toes because the God Damn Heat has to be BLASTING on the window, and ONLY on the window so that a teeny tiny patch of window remains clear.  TWO FREAKING HOURS.  I think I've earned the right to bitch for a minute.

There was a certain novelty of watching the thermometer on my dash dip below zero last month.  Just how cold could it get?  Seeing -17 on the dash, at the time, was pretty damn cool.  Waking up to -7 last week, randomly, was considerably less cool.  Did you know it's impossible to buckle a child in his car-seat when you're wearing mittens?  And do you know how fast your fingers get cold when it's -7 out and you can't wear your mittens?  Pretty damn fast.

This morning I told Ben it was going to snow again and he got all excited.  I told him I am ready for spring.  I am ready for shorts and t-shirts and flip flops.  I'm ready for grass and sand and the beach.  He quickly changed his mind and decided he's ready for spring too.

We're all ready for spring.

Instead I got a two hour car ride home in the snow.

I am so done with winter.

Is it March yet?

Ahhhh....peace and quiet.  No one is home at the moment, well, that's not exactly true, both my adult stepsons are here, but since they're asleep and rarely make an appearance for anything other than food or showers, I am alone for now!

January was a miserable month, and I am glad it's over.  I just wish the cold weather would realize it's over and start warming up just a smidge.  You know it's been cold when you remark to your child how warm and spring-like it feels only to discover that the temperature is 23 degrees.

School started up again for another semester and I've got an especially mind numbing selection of classes this time.  Governmental Accounting and Intermediate Accounting-Part II.  For fun, I've mixed in Finite Math, whatever the hell that means.  I will (sheepishly) admit that the math class is kind of fun, though I had completely forgotten that logarithms existed and I kind of wish I could have kept it that way.  My fingers are crossed that I might actually have this degree wrapped up by the end of the fall semester.  It depends entirely on the scheduling at YCCC, which I have discovered doesn't cater to working students as much as they may think it does.

In other big news, we celebrated a few birthdays recently.  Jake, my oldest stepson turned 21.  Do you want to feel old?  Go have a beer with your kid.  I think Don's suffering a bit more than I am from this new development, mainly because Don is old and I'm not.  (Don't worry, he doesn't read my blog, he won't be offended.)  But this certainly is an adjustment.

And last week, little Ben turned FOUR years old.  And I am suffering from this much, much more than my husband.  My little guy isn't a baby anymore!  I can't even call him a toddler, or a little kid really.  He's just a kid now.  A kid!!  A kid who's going to be in school before I know it!  The plan is to sign him up for T-ball this spring.  So be prepared for some amazingly adorable photos and videos of Ben playing t-ball.  It should be especially fun since he is about the tiniest four year old I've ever seen.

And the last exciting development in our world, is the impromptu planning of a family vacation in March!  Not only will Don and I get to take Ben to Florida to check out Animal Kingdom and Legoland, we will be going with my father and step-mother!  I have never been on vacation with my father and am looking forward to seeing him attempt to "relax."  (If you know my father I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.)  I am also secretly hoping that he has a Florida wardrobe of Bermuda shorts and Hawaiian shirts, but that really seems unlikely.  And if that isn't enough excitement, my SISTER will be joining us all in Florida as well!  It has been nearly a year since I've seen her and I can't wait to see her again.  I know Ben is excited about seeing Aunt Kelsey as well.  What started out as a "wouldn't that be nice" has actually turned into a family vacation and I am thrilled!

It seems my peace and quiet is coming to an end.  Back to the never ending mountain of homework!

An Open Letter to Junk Mail

Dear Get BIGGER with Free Sample,

Thank you for not emailing me with an offer to enlarge my manhood.  For far too long I've been concerned that my email address, which starts with the word "princess," might be construed as too masculine.  I see now that you have finally identified that I am part of the 50% of the population that does not appreciate your weekly/daily/hourly offers to increase the size of my penis.  This due to the fact, of course, that I don't actually have a penis.

I'm truly glad to see that you have finally focused on attempting to enlarge something that matters to me.  Because, like the majority of women, I would in fact like to have "Boobs as big as balloons."

I appreciate that you have cut to the chase here.  No offers of inches, no promises of 40% growth.  You are bringing it right to the table.  "As big as balloons."  Yes.  Now that is a visual I can get on board with.  Balloons.  In my bra.  Thank you Get BIGGER with Free Sample.  I now know what perfection looks like.   And perfection is: "Boobs as big as balloons."

I think I'm going to go get some balloons today.

Sincerely,

Kyla

Gotta Love Spam!!

How to Snow Blow the Driveway

Step 1:  Call husband energetically offering to snow blow driveway so he doesn't have to do it in the dark when he gets home from work.

Step 2:  Bundle up in at LEAST 75 layers.

Step 3: Grab Blowtorch.

Step 4:  Hold Blowtorch on iced up shed lock for one minute.  Try not to catch shed on fire.  Try key.  Drop blowtorch in snow.  Swear profusely.  Get blowtorch started again.  Try not to catch shed on fire.  Blow out small fire.  Try key again.

Step 5:  Gently lower 5000 pound snow blower to the ground.  Resolve not to tell husband about the crash landing and possible denting.

Step 6:  Open choke, set to run, pump fuel thingey, pull cord.  Pull cord.  Pull cord.  Pull cord.

Step 7: Open choke, set to run, pump fuel thingey, stand on snow blower, pull cord.  Pull cord.  Pull cord.

Step 8:  Kick snow blower.

Step 9:  Text adult child living rent free in the upstairs bedroom to come down and start snow blower.

Step 10:  Make adult child pull cord.  Pull cord.  Pull cord.  Pull cord.

Step 11:  With (finally) running snow blower begin walking up and down driveway.

Step 12:  Get face full of snow.

Step 13:  Adjust blower thing to other direction.

Step 14: Get face full of snow.

Step 15:  Repeat steps 12-14 while walking up and down driveway until driveway has considerably less snow on it and face has considerably more.

Step 16:  Leave snow blower parked haphazardly at top of driveway.  Resolve to let lazy ass step-children or husband put it away and finish the shoveling.

Step 17:  Make tea and resolve that next time you want to do something nice for husband, bake cookies.

A Little Light Dusting

This is me with the figurative Pledge and rag in hand dusting off my blog for 2014.

I may have completely ignored my blog for the majority of 2013.  Whoops!  I did sit down several times to write, but it is harder than you think to start writing when you've taken a break for weeks/months at a time.

But I'm here now to report that 2013 was a pretty spectacular yet dull year.  And that is a-okay with me! We did have a few big moments, Marcus graduated from High School, Ben was fully potty trained and learned to write his name, Jake moved in...then out....then in again, and Don and I worked hard managing our money and were able to hire someone to replace (almost) all the windows in our house.  We are also in good shape to replace the bay windows and siding this spring.  Yay for home improvement!

But aside from those few items of import, 2013 was really pretty uneventful.  Just a lot of work, school, play and happiness.  I'm not sure you can ask for much more than that.

As for 2014, it is so far on course to look exactly the same as 2013.  Plugging away at my accounting degree, wishing it was a bit more interesting, working too many jobs but enjoying them, spending time with my favorite almost-four-year-old (yeah that's right FOUR), reading and, hopefully, writing.

I'm not going to set myself a lot of goals for 2014, but I do want to read less (perhaps I am the only person in the world with that goal?) and write more.  There is a woman and a story in my head that have been hanging out there for a while, and I think I need to see what happens when they appear on paper.  Probably nothing.  But then...maybe something.  I guess I'll find out in 2014!

Happy New Year!

A Couple Sad Goodbyes

Over the last couple of weeks two people I remember fondly from my childhood summers have passed away.  This has left me saddened but also scrounging up some wonderful memories I had nearly forgotten.

A few weeks ago I was told of the passing of Dr. Mason Romaine.  When I was young, my mother used to clean their house once a week.  She would bring my sister and I along and we would spend our time having tea parties with Dr. and Mrs. Romaine or playing with them or walking across the street and playing on the beach.  Tea parties were our favorite as we would sit and sip hot chocolate and eat little cookies with a true southern lady.  If you are going to learn manners, you should learn them from a southern lady.  True to form, a week after sending my sympathy note to Mrs. Romaine I received a sweet note from her thanking me for my kind words.  That's how manners are done.  Dr. Romaine was a lovely man who lived a very important life and spent 68 years married to his wonderful wife.  How lucky am I to have such sweet childhood memories of him and his wife!

This weekend I learned of another passing which still leaves me in disbelief, my childhood friend Katie lost her mother Lori this past weekend and I am still struggling to comprehend that the lovely lady I knew as a kid is gone.

Nearly all of my memories from summertime as a child involved Katie and her family.  She came to the island during summer vacation and it seemed we spent all of our waking moments together divided between her house, my house, and the beach.  I can remember spending mornings at the beginning of the summer waiting at the end of her driveway to see if she was on this boat, or maybe the next boat, so summer could officially begin with the arrival of my friend.

We spent a lot of our time at the beach, playing on floats or building forts in the rocks.  We played with our dolls, we played dress up with the finds from the rummage sale that our mothers would scrounge up for us.  We had lemonade stands and pooled our earnings to buy penny candy from the Dark Harbor Shop.  We picked berries, we had sleepovers, we drove her brother nuts.  We had fun.

Always, our families were in the background.  Her mom making us lemonade for our lemonade stand or giving us free reign of the kitchen to "cook" whatever berries we discovered in the backyard.  Our moms sitting together in the sun at the beach while we spent hours playing in the sand.  Her mom trying to teach me to swim, tripping on a rock and dumping me into the ocean.

I haven't seen my friend Katie or her mother in years, and it leaves me very sad that Lori is gone.  But I am so very glad that I still have so many memories of all of them.  Not just a few, but summers of them.

"Seashells remind us that every passing life leaves something beautiful behind." 
 -Unknown

http://obits.dignitymemorial.com/dignity-memorial/obituary-print.aspx?n=Mason-Romaine&lc=2309&pid=163332208&mid=5438966

http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/berkshire/obituary.aspx?n=lori-anne-dalton-rech&pid=164034874

Leprechaun Hunting

My son has leprechaun fever.  I'm not sure why he has chosen to become obsessed with leprechauns, but he has, and it's kind of hilarious.

This week at daycare a leprechaun snuck into the house and left some sneaky footprints on the kids' snack table and turned the milk for their cheerios green.  Since then, my son has been obsessed with this leprechaun.

I came home Tuesday night after class, when he as supposed to be in bed already, and got dragged upstairs to hear all about the leprechaun.  Ben was very concerned that Ms. Holly needed to catch it fast so it doesn't turn our milk green.  He was also very determined that once this sneaky leprechaun was caught, he was going to make a little bed for it and buy it some green shoes so it would play toys with him.

Yesterday we spent our whole car ride hunting for the leprechaun which, oddly enough, we never spotted.  While I was at work, Ben convinced his Dad to build him a leprechaun trap.  Said trap consisted of a cardboard box propped up with a plate of cheerios underneath.  Apparently, this wasn't enough to please Ben.  He woke up this morning and insisted that Dad's best friend Tim build him a bigger trap.  Good call on Ben's part, since Tim is an engineer and a propped up box and cheerios is a pretty lame trap, even to a three year old.

Since St. Patty's day is this weekend, I've got to admit that I'm dying to buy the kid a box of Lucky Charms to celebrate with.  It has nothing to do with the fact that I haven't had Lucky Charms since I was twelve...nope...nothing to do with that.  I might just have to send this leprechaun a note and ask him to leave a box in the leprechaun trap.  You know...for Ben to enjoy....