Friday, December 28, 2012


December was a little nutty.  Hence the vacation from my blog.  I didn't actually intend on taking a blog-cation, but that's just what happened.

The beginning of December was crazy as I finished up the semester at YCCC.  There was so much homework in all of my classes it just seemed like it was a constant uphill battle to get it all done.  But I did.  And I'm happy to say I had A's in all of my classes.  A 4.0 GPA is a pretty sweet way to start off this degree!

Once school and finals were over, Christmas started in full swing!  We took Ben on the Polar Express, went north to visit his grandparents and went to a family Christmas party.  There was shopping, wrapping, cooking and hanging out with family.  It was a lot of fun, but it also kept me quite busy!

Now it's over.  And my house looks like a toy store exploded.  There are currently four separate race tracks set up in my living room, in addition to a train/car table and a medieval castle.  How no one has tripped and broken an ankle is beyond me.  Tomorrow's goals will be to get rid of the Christmas tree so we can find spots for all these toys...just in time for January to get here with Ben's third birthday.  It's never ending....

January also brings boatloads of work.  1099s and year end stuff will all need to be done for my bookkeeping job in addition to my two usual jobs.  Fortunately I have a few weeks before school starts again, and then it's back to business with Accounting II. 

In the mean time, I'm going to enjoy the last couple of days of 2012 and relax and play with my kid.  We've got enough toys to keep us busy indoors and plenty of snow to have fun outdoors!!

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

The Lights!

When I was a kid we had a sorta family tradition of riding around the island looking at Christmas lights.  It was never anything formal and not on any certain nights during the holiday season, it was just one of those "Can we go for a ride and see the Christmas lights, pleeeeeeeeeease???" things.  But I really enjoyed it.  Driving around and looking at the lights, counting how many houses we saw, marveling at the time and effort put into decorations.

After we moved off the island when I was in middle school, we didn't do much driving around to look at the lights. 

But now I've got Ben.  In Ben's opinion, Christmas lights are about the best thing on the planet.  Driving home from anywhere he's got his eyes out the window looking for Christmas lights.  And I get to hear things like "Mom, look at the purple lights!" and "Mom, look it's a 'nowman!" and "Mom, look at those pretty lights!" from the backseat.  It's pretty awesome.  I'm really glad he enjoys it, and I'm hoping we can make a few trips out this holiday season just to drive around a look at lights.  Perhaps we can have our own little sorta tradition.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving!

I have a lot to be thankful for this year.

As always, I am thankful for my family.  Every last one of them! 

We made a lot of changes this year in our family and it seems things have really been working out for us!  I made the decision to go back to school, which prompted an amazing opportunity to start working part-time in the new career field I wanted to take classes in.  And while it's a bit overwhelming at times, and it means not spending as much time with Ben as I had been, I think having the extra income has really made a difference and I know I'm enjoying using my brain again both at work and at school.

We also made the decision to put Ben in daycare this year.  I hate that I can't spend every minute of every day with him, but the changes in him have been amazing to watch this year.  His vocabulary has just exploded and watching him play and communicate with other kids has been awesome.  It's also great to see him show concern and compassion for his friends at daycare.  I'm so glad that he's getting this experience a few days a week in addition to the days each week he stays home with me.

I'm thankful too that my husband was finally given some of the recognition and compensation he deserves at his job this year.  He's worked for a long time at his job and enjoys what he does, and while he struggled for a time over whether or not to find something new, I'm glad that things have worked out for him so he feels comfortable staying there.

We've also had some remarkable changes with the big boys this year too.  Marcus has made a huge turn around in his attitude towards school and life since last year and I am so happy!  His grade are better, his attitude is better and he's even challenging himself with college classes.  And while Jake is still taking his time figuring out this "grown-up" thing, he did make the decision to move out on his own and is learning how go about becoming an independent adult.

So yes, it's been a year of changes, and it seems all of them have been for the best.  And I am so thankful for that. 

And, of course, I am thankful to be a mommy.  Without question, the most amazing thing I have ever and will ever do.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Just Say No to Scurvy

Jake came home today for Thanksgiving Break.  What, exactly, he's taking a break from, I'm not really sure, but he's here, he's staying to eat turkey, and that sounds good to me.

He actually just came home the weekend before last for a quick hello.  He had a friend drop him off while we were grocery shopping and, being responsible parents, we offered to buy him some groceries to take home with him.

It was going fine, we picked up a pack of macaroni and cheese, some snacks and pasta, nothing elaborate.  Then we walked through the taco aisle. 

Me: "Would you like some taco stuff?"
Jake: "Ummm, yeah, I think we're out of taco stuff.  That's what we cook when we eat real food."

Oh dear. 

If he's living in a house where tacos equate home cooking we have a bit of a problem.  Don and I both shook our heads and beelined it to the fruits and veggies.  We sent him home with a bag of apples, fruit cups, baby carrots and salad mix.  We gave him a bag of potatoes (who knows if he will figure those out) and a box of minute rice.  It wasn't an amazing selection of food, but who knows when he last ate a vegetable.  Argh!!!

I swear I've tried to teach them both to cook!  I guess I've still got some work to do....

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Just Another Month

Every month I struggle with the fact that I'm not going to have another baby.  It's a struggle to watch friends and family happily expand their families while I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'm not.  But as difficult as it is I have a bit of a confession:

As cute as this was:

I would take this any day:

 Ben was a hard baby, and I remember it vividly.  As much as I would love to feel more baby kicks, and smell more baby smell and snuggle a little mini-me, I adore the little kid that I have now so much more.  He's smart, and funny, and quick to learn.  He's polite and kind and loving, and I don't think I could ask for much more from a little kid.
So as much as I might struggle with the idea of not having another baby, I'm very, very content with my amazing little guy!
The black and white photo is by my cousin, Sierra Kristen Photography...the other is obviously by me.  :)

Monday, November 12, 2012

An Open Letter to a Customer

Dear Sir-or-Madam,

Might I start by saying, I'm a very positive person.  I'm very kind, and as I'm sure many people would tell you, I always seek out the best in people and believe that people are generally kind when given a chance.

But you sir-or-madam, are a douchebag.  (And no, this is not a term I use often or lightly!)

When you failed to leave me a tip last week after pouring you a beer, I chose to overlook it.  Sure I was annoyed, offended, and when I saw you coming to one of my tables tonight, I grimaced; but I decided to give you the benefit of the doubt.  Perhaps you'd had a bad day?  Perhaps you are merely showing your age and had moment of forgetfulness last week.

After tonight I am fairly certain that you are just an ass.

After occupying one of my tables with your "buddies" for FOUR hours, during my dinner rush, my ONLY rush, might I add, it was really all I could do not to come back and stuff the $2.50 "tip" you so generously left me, down your shirt. 

Yes, $2.50.

A bit of advice sir-or-madam, should you find yourself in a similar situation in a restaurant with a server not as pleasant as myself, when your bill comes to $47.50, and you hand him or her $50.00 and say "Keep the change," you might want to be prepared for a pitcher of ice dumped on top of your head, or perhaps a fist fight in the parking lot.

I would have liked to take your change back to you, tell you that you obviously need the money more than I do, just to see what you would say, but I'm fairly certain you would have just pocketed it, not getting my point, not learning a lesson.  I would have liked to have explained to you that while yes, I am a waitress in a bar, I am NOT actually desperate for your $2.50.  I'm married.  We have two incomes.  I have a college degree.  I am working on a second college degree.  I am waitressing so I can be home during the day with my amazing son, and because I enjoy it.

Except waiting on you.  I do not enjoy that.

Someday, sir-or-madam, I hope you have that server that dumps a pitcher of ice on your head when you leave a 5% tip on a busy Friday night.  Because despite wanting to do that to you, the next time you come in I will most likely greet you with a smile, bring you your food and drinks and be equally as attentive a server to you as I am to all my other customers.  Why?  Because you don't actually matter to me.  And neither does your $2.50.



**I actually wrote this a few months ago.  I don't think any of the customers from the bar read my blog, but just in case, I thought I would give it some time for anonymity's sake.**

Sunday, November 11, 2012


Despite being an overall productive day, yesterday was also one of "those" days where it seemed every time I turned around disaster was striking!

I got up and made a batch of ricotta scones for breakfast.  I was almost out of cinnamon so I ended up making them "chai spiced" with a little ginger, cardamom and vanilla.  They were very yummy.  Unfortunately, I left them on the stove to cool and completely forgot about them until I was about half way through my shower.  Which, coincidentally, was roughly the same time that the dog remembered I made a batch of scones and left them on the stove.  When I finally ran downstairs to check, Max was mid-bite and there was only one left on the pan.  Bummer.

Later in the morning I sat down to work on homework.  I was able to get all of my assignments finished for next week and even wrote my speech due next Saturday.  Success!  Until I walked away from the computer for a minute to fold laundry and the cat took a flying leap onto the computer table knocking my tea all across the laptop keyboard.

I quickly grabbed the laptop and shut it down and dumped all the tea off the keyboard (it's never a fun sight to see water pouring out of your computer).  I dried it with a towel as best I could and then went straight to the bathroom where I gently used my hair dryer to dry the keys.  (FYI: After I did this Don googled what to do when you get water on your're not supposed to blow dry it...oops.)  We let it sit overnight to finish air drying and (fortunately) it appears to be working fine today.  The keys are a bit sticky (good thing it was tea not soda!) but it seems to be functioning fine, which is both a blessing and a curse.  It's good that we don't have to shell out money for a new laptop right now...but I HATE this laptop with a passion and would have loved the excuse to buy a new one!

Needless to say, I'm glad today was a bit of an improvement.  No major catastrophes...aside from a two year old that keeps "forgetting" to pee on the potty.  Unfortunately I'm back to work tomorrow, long weekends I guess aren't in the cards for me anytime soon.  Oh well, at least at work I won't have to deal with pee!  Hopefully...

Friday, November 9, 2012

Friday Fun!


I took Ben to the Peek-a-Boo Center in Westbrook today.  Which was pretty kind of me since he decided to wake me up at 5:30 this morning because he "took two napses" and was "done napping."  Which makes even less sense at 5:30 in the morning than it does right now, trust me.  I had been planning on taking him all week since the rest of his daycare was going there today for a field trip, so it worked out well.  We got there at 9:30, his friends showed up around 10 and he played with them, with me, and by himself until about 12:30.

If you have little kids and haven't been there, you really should consider checking it out for a few hours.  It's clean, it's big, and there are TONS of toys, none of which resemble a Chuck E Cheese game.

We spent a lot of time at the train table (shocking, right?) but also played a couple games of memory, did a puzzle, painted, drew some pictures and bounced (and bounced, and bounced) on a mini trampoline.

It was fun, it was different, and I got to spend some quality time doing what my kid likes best...playing!

And now I'm looking forward to a weekend at home with the little goober.  Weather looks nice so it looks like we're going to be playing outside!  Nice!  He can help me put up the Christmas lights.  And I'm sure it will go nothing like last year.....

Wednesday, November 7, 2012


I'm tired.  That kind of tired that had me almost asleep on the couch while Ben was still playing.  I'm even questioning whether or not I want to have a piece of cake, or just go crash in bed. 

(Obviously I'm going to eat the cake.  I don't think it's possible to be too tired for cake.)

Since I'm so tired, I'm just going to leave you with a pretty adorable Ben moment:

We picked out mittens to wear to daycare.

"Mom, can you put my muffins on?"

"Your what??"

"My muffins.  Can you put them on my hands?"

He's just about the cutest thing ever.

Ok.  Cake.  Bed.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

I Voted!

Well, I voted today.  To do my civic duty I had to get up at 5am to make it to the polls and then work.  Yikes!  But I'm glad I went.  I'm not a political person.  Not at all.  But voting for the president, and other issues that I feel strongly about, will get me out to vote.

Despite not being political, I will say this: I do feel very strongly that Question One should pass.  The last time this was up for vote I was pregnant.  It was a bit of an eye opener for me that the child I was carrying could be born into a society that might deny him rights for being who he is.  With raging Mommy hormones, I voted to keep gay marriage legal.  It was heart breaking when the law was overturned.  As a result, my son WAS born into a society that would deny him rights should he be gay. 

I wasn't very happy about that and am very glad to see it back on the ballot once again.  I voted Yes on One today.  And if it doesn't pass this year, I will go back and vote the next time it is on the ballot, and the next, and the next, until it passes.

Gay or straight, I want my son, my stepsons, my family, my friends and complete strangers to be able to marry whomever they love.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Happy Birthday to Me!

Today is my 29th birthday.  The last year of my twenties has begun.  I'm not really upset about turning 30 next year, it just seems a little unreal.  How on earth did I get this old?  I swear High School was just a few years ago.  But then I think about it...and it seems like college was just a few years ago...and wasn't IVF a few years ago....and I'm pretty sure I gave birth a few years ago too.  I guess some time has passed since High School, some very busy time.

It's been a quiet birthday and because of my hard work over the weekend, I don't have any homework to do tonight.  So I think I'm going to curl up with a big ol' piece of homemade applesauce cake (with cream cheese frosting) and the book I'm reading on my Kindle (The Gunseller by Hugh Laurie) and just relax. 

I'm going to enjoy being 29, because once I turn thirty I think I'm going to have start exercising.  And buying wrinkle cream.  And taking more vitamins.

Thank goodness I've got one more year!

Sunday, November 4, 2012

A 180

Marcus brought home a progress report this weekend and it was practically jaw dropping.  Is it straight A's.  Nope.  Honor Roll.  Nope.  But he is passing all his classes.  And he's doing really well in almost all of them.

This may not seem like a great achievement.  Lots of kids do pretty well in their classes.  Lots do really well in their classes.  But we're not talking about any kid.  We're talking about Marcus.

Nearly a year ago we were hitting a wall with Marcus.  He had zero interest in school.  None.  His grades were miserable.  His teachers couldn't get him to take things seriously.  He really just didn't care.

Have you ever tried to tell a teenager to take school seriously?  It's a bit like talking to a wall.  A wall that can roll its eyes.

Last winter, when we were at our wits end, we caught Marcus making some very foolish decisions.  As a result, we grounded him.  From everything.  For a long time.  And we lectured him.  About everything.  For a long time.

I don't know if that worked, or if it was something else, but I'm telling you, it's been a complete 180 with this kid.  And it's pretty damn amazing.

By the end of last year he just missed honor roll by one class by a few points.  We were flabbergasted.  He signed up for a college course at York County Community College.  We were speechless.  He found a job and has been actively helping out around the house more and watching his younger siblings more.

I'm not going to say that we're parents of the year or anything, but apparently something finally got through to him, and it's been pretty amazing.

So with a progress report with above average grades, positive teacher comments and even a report from his professor at YCCC of a B average, we couldn't be more proud!

And who wouldn't be happy to overhear this little conversation between two brothers:

"Marcus.  Marcus.  Will you play with me?"

"Sure Bud."

"ALRIGHT!  Let's GO!!"

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Going For It!

Well, I'm going to make an honest attempt at NaBloPoMo.

(That's National Blog Posting Month for those of you not in the know.  Which I assume is anyone reading my blog.)

The goal is to post a blog every day for the month of November.  Why the hell anyone decided on November is beyond me.  Aside from December, it has to be the busiest month of the year.  But, I managed to do it last year, and I know I felt really proud of myself at the end of the month, and much more confident in my ability to write.  So, here I go again.

I'm not really sure this is going to be possible, so I'm not going to beat myself up if I miss a day here or there, but I am going to try to make an honest effort to at least blog more, even if it's not everyday.

At the moment I have a lot on my plate.  I'm working Monday through Wednesday at my 9-5 job in Portland.  It's not really 9-5.  I don't actually know anyone that works 9-5.  But I'm there 8-4:30, which is close, but not so catchy sounding.  But you get my point.  On Tuesday nights I have class in Wells from 5:30-8.  Thursdays I stay home with Ben and cram in homework for one of my two online classes, then I head to work at the Bar from 5-11ish.  Fridays I generally have off, though occasionally my schedule gets switched up and I end up working at one place or the other.  If I'm not "working" then I'm trying to squish in more homework, more housework, and bookkeeping for my "other" part time job.  Ben's here too, so I'm definitely not relaxing.  Saturdays are usually spent either cleaning or shopping until I head into work at the Bar at 5.  Sundays are usually hit or miss.  Some days I have an extra Bar shift, other Sundays I'm home for the day trying to soak up some family time.  That's usually followed either way with an evening trying to get things ready for the upcoming week.  Menu planning, laundry, baking, cleaning, homework, whatever.

So when I say I'm kinda busy, I'm not kidding.  Hopefully I can force myself to take a few minutes each day to write something, even if it's just a little recap, or something cute my kid did.  I guess we'll see what comes up this month.

Happy NaBloPoMo!

Friday, November 2, 2012

My Scary Pumpkin!

Halloween was Wednesday and Ben did a little trick-or-treating!  For the last month he had decided that he was going to be a Scary Pumpkin for Halloween.  I was sure he'd want to be a train or a race car, but nope, pumpkin it was.  No complaints, a pumpkin costume is waaaay easier to assemble than a train!

I decided once again to take a stab at making his costume instead of buying one.  Until he reaches the age where he has to have a certain costume to look like his friends, I'm going to try to make his costumes.  It's way more fun, and I get to pretend I'm super mom.

So, for Scary Pumpkin I bought an orange t-shirt a few sizes too large.  I opened up the hem at the bottom and threaded a string through so it would have a drawstring to tighten.  I bought black iron on patch material and cut out "scary" eyes, nose and mouth.  Because I'm a slacker, I actually ironed it all together Tuesday night at 9:00 after accounting class with my iron plugged into the generator.  Ooops.  I picked him up black leggings (FYI-no one makes green leggings) and a little pumpkin flashlight and treat bag.  His grandmother had knit him a pumpkin hat when he was an infant and fortunately his big old noggin still fit in it.  I also scored some pretty adorable jack-o-lantern galoshes at TJ Maxx on clearance to complete the ensemble.

The end result was pretty damn adorable!


We got our power back about 10 minutes before we left to go trick-or-treating so I was able to snap a picture in the light! 

The nice thing about taking an almost-three-year-old trick-or-treating is that he has no idea what to expect.  As a result, we were able to walk to the six houses right next to us and he thought he made an amazing candy haul.  He had such a good time and said "trick-or-treat" at every house we visited and "thank you" which is pretty awesome for a two year old!  After we had been to two houses he was marching down the road holding my hand and said "Mom, I love you!"  What a goober!  He had such a good time!

The "Big" Haul

Yeah, that's a full size Hershey's bar.  And Yeah, Mom's going to eat it.

His Halloween Treat: Nerds.
Yup, I have the cutest kid ever.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Oh Sandy Baaaaby

If you did not just read the title of this blog as though you were John Travolta singing to Olivia Newton-John please stop reading and start over.  Thank you.

So we had a hurricane.  And as I hinted at in my last blog post, I went above and beyond preparing for it in hopes that it would end up being less of an ordeal.  Well, it didn't end up being a very severe storm, but that didn't make it any easier.

We lost our power (as expected) around 11:00 on Monday night.  That was actually much later than I anticipated us losing power.  We are usually out as soon as a stiff breeze picks up.  Unfortunately, my little community in Waterboro tends to be last on the CMP priority list.

So imagine my surprise when I got word that the neighbors down the street had their power back early Tuesday evening!  I thought sure that we would be next.   So I went to bed Tuesday night fairly confident that our power would be back before I had to get up Wednesday morning and get ready for work.


Despite the fact that the house on the corner of my road FIVE houses down had power Tuesday evening, we waited until shortly before seven on WEDNESDAY before we got ours back.  (Um, thanks to Bangor Hydro, by the way, for actually making that happen.)

We've lost our power for much longer, and at much colder times of the year, but I can't tell you how annoying it was to see lights at the end of the road but still have to get up in the morning and take a damn sponge bath.

So yeah, that sucked.  But it wasn't the suckiest part.

Monday night, during the storm, I was sitting on the couch doing homework.  And by homework I mean I had an open text book on my lap and I was asleep.  At about 10:00 an extremely loud crack and thud occurred DIRECTLY outside the widow behind the couch where I was sitting.

I know that as a mom I've always been curious about how I would react to an emergency involving my son.  Would I instinctively put him first like I'm supposed to, or would that fight or flight instinct kick in and I would act instinctively to save myself?  Well, I can safely say, I would be all over my son.  I jumped off the couch and ran towards his room so fast I actually fell before I got to the stairs.  My husband picked me up and told me to slow down, that Ben was fine.  I think I garbled something out at him about not being awake and not caring and I hauled it up the stairs.

He was stretched out on his bed and snoring.

I thought I was going to have a heart attack.  At the time, we thought the tree had just come down right next to the house, narrowly missing our pellet stove vent.  Nope.  In the morning we discovered that it had fallen on the roof, broken apart, slid down the wall, cracked up our siding and then landed just a few feet away from our pellet stove vent.  Awesome.

The damage is relatively minor and should be inexpensive to repair.  We were pretty lucky and will probably be doing some dead tree removal later this fall or in the spring. 

So that sucked.  Now do you want to hear the suckiest part?

Waking up Wednesday morning without power knowing that the neighbors all had power was pretty damn frustrating.  Having the generator not start was REALLY frustrating.  Discovering that your cars had been broken into, well, that was just miserable.

We live in a pretty quiet country neighborhood.  We don't keep much in our cars, and we don't lock them at night.  We've never had a problem.  But, apparently someone decided they needed to take advantage of us unfortunate folks without electricity and steal from us.  Fortunately we really don't keep anything in our cars, so nothing was taken from mine.  Don had his GPS in his car that was taken, it was rather old and not really worth anything, but it is something he uses often.  He felt pretty violated.  The thieves were also poking around our shed, so we were actually very fortunate that they didn't try to run away with our generator, snow blower or lawn mower.

We did call the police and I guess it had happened to several cars on our road during the course of the night.  Needless to say, our house has become Fort Knox.  Don has instituted a locked door policy at all times, the car doors are locked, the shed is locked, and he's on a mission this weekend for security lights and new door knobs.  We're also going to look at getting the generator wired into the fuse box so we can keep outside lights on when the power is out.  (It will also give us hot water when the power is I'm totally ok with that!)

So, while Hurricane Sandy may not have been the strongest storm up here in Maine, and we may not have been without power for that long a period of time, it was still one of our worst storm experiences.

And it also left me with that damn song Sandy from Grease stuck in my head.  It's not even one of the cool songs.  Uggggh.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Getting Ready for a Hurricane

Kyla's Hurricane Preparedness Check List:

-Find Flashlights
-Test Flashlights
-Put Flashlight Batteries on Shopping List
-Wash Hair
-Shave Legs
-Pick Up Generator from Mom's House
-Go To Walmart
-Wish No One Else Was at Walmart*
-Buy More Batteries
-Buy Lamp Oil
-Buy Chips
-Buy Extension Cords
-Set Up Generator
-Buy Gas for Generator
-Buy (more) Gas for Car
-Buy (more) Chips
-Consolidate Freezers
-Add Bags of Water to Freezer to keep frozen food cold longer
-Wash Dishes
-Load Dishwasher
-Vacuum Floors
-Wash 8,000 Loads of Laundry
-Curse Small Child who keeps making more laundry
-Give Husband and Teenager Hair Cuts
-Do All Office Work
-Print Out Homework for Week
-Eat All Sweets in Fridge that could go bad without power
-Blog, because the power is going to be going out for a while...

*Just a thought Walmart: perhaps if you had a smaller "lounge/sleepwear department" less people would actually wear "lounge/sleepwear" while shopping at your store.  I have, in fact, seen a woman wearing two piece pink floral pajamas while shopping at Walmart.  With slippers.  And a purse.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

A Quiet Little Wednesday

Well, I did some counting.  And I'm not going to make my goal for the year of reading 100 books.  I was off to an amazing start, but the addition of a second part time job and then school has crippled my ability to read anything.  Which is very frustrating.  I also set the goal to read five Jane Austen books.  I've done three so far, and while I probably could read two more, I'm not exactly sure that's how I want to spend my precious reading time for the next couple of months.

So frustrating. 

I spent the day at home today with Ben who has a cold.  He's not that sick, but I didn't want to send him to daycare to cough on all the other kids.  Plus I don't like it when he's sick, and I want to be the one taking care of him.  Since it was a very laid back day, I managed to get quite a bit of my homework done.  So much, in fact, that I've found time to write this blog and contemplate starting a book.

Unfortunately I still have roughly one million things on my to-do list for today, so starting a book is probably not going to happen quite yet.  But while I've been thinking today, I've also been thinking about my blog.  Next month is NaBloPoMo, (National Blog Posting Month) which I participated in last year.  I really, really enjoyed it last year.  But last year I was only working one job and I wasn't in school.  I just don't know if I have enough hours in the day to devote a piece of each day to writing on my blog.  I know I'd like to.  Last year I felt pretty proud of myself after making it to December 1st having written something each day.

So I don't know, I'm still thinking.  Should I do it, should I skip it?  I just hate to add one more thing to my list of "Didn't quite happen this year."  But then, is it better to add something to that list than to the "Man I wish I'd tried that list?"


Thursday, October 18, 2012

How Did the Dog Turn on the Shower?

Today hasn't been a stellar day.  Ben woke up too early and didn't feel like going back to sleep so laid in his bed yelling MOM until I came in and unearthed his special blankie from beneath the covers.   Five minutes after that, he had to pee.  I gave up on getting him to go back to bed and hauled him in bed with me to snuggle and watch cartoons.  Well, he snuggled and watched cartoons.  I passed out and felt like a horrible person when I woke up later to realize that I had been ignoring my kid.  Oops.

After an argument over underpants with the little guy I made the amateur mommy mistake of letting him go commando under his jammies since he'd already pooped.

You know where this is going.  He pooped.  And I had to clean to floor.  And the kid.  And the jammies.  Damn it.

After successfully completing the large list of chores I had lined up for the morning, Ben and I celebrated with a picnic lunch.  It was PB&J in the middle of the driveway, not exactly glamorous, but it was so nice out!

After lunch I dragged Ben in the house, up the stairs and to his room where I had to wrestle with him to get a diaper on so he could take a nap.  He didn't seem to think he needed a nap.  He was wrong and I'm bigger, so I won.

While wrestling him back into his pants I heard a strange noise.  How did the dog turn on the shower? I thought to myself.  FYI: Dogs can't turn on showers.  They can sound like a shower as they pee while walking down the (carpeted) stairs, through the dining room to the front door. 

Who doesn't love a urine trail?

So I kissed my kid, stuffed him in his bed and used half a roll of paper towels to soak up what must have been 5 gallons of dog urine from the carpeting on the stairs and the rest of the trail leading to the front door.

Like I said, it hasn't been a stellar day.

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Blabber Mouth

Have I mentioned lately that my kid is adorable?  He's turned into quite a chatter box (wonder who he got that from...oops!) and as a result is pretty damn funny to listen to.

He talks to his trains:

"Uh oh Thomas, Percy bump you!  CRASH!  Oh no!  Don't worry Thomas I save you!"

He talks about his friends:

"Mom, Baby Logan loves me."  "He does, why?"  "Because I'm his friend, Mom."

He talks about monsters:

"Mom, there's a monster on the house."  "There is?"  "Yup, it's a green-blue-red one.  It's a red one."

And then he just talks:

"Mom, don't worry about me, I ok."

"WAIT A MINUTE!  I forgot my vitamins!"

"WAIT A MINUTE!  I show you something mom."

"Ben it's time to eat dinner."  "Mom, I caaannnn'tttt waaaannnntt to eat me dinner."

"Mom, it stinks in here."  "I know buddy, it's a bathroom, shhhhh."  "Mom it stinks."  "Shhhh."  "Mom, you pee?  GOOD JOB!!  You want a jelly bean?"  (This conversation took place in a very PUBLIC bathroom.)

"Mom, I'm not handsome.  I'm Ben."

Ok, so I understand if you don't find all of the above the most hilarious things you've ever heard, but I'm telling you, my kid is a riot! 

Yesterday we took him to the Fryeburg Fair to see the animals.  He was pretty excited and pretty impressed.  He loved the cows and the draft horses, he liked the sheep and goats, thought the chickens were cool, but noisy, and loved the little bunny rabbits.  Then we waited for a very, very long time in the line to go in and pet the baby animals.  Which was probably the high light of the afternoon:

As you can see, he had a great time!


Friday, September 28, 2012

A Lovely Fall Evening

Yesterday I promised Ben we'd go for a hike.  It was one of those "For the love of God child, stop whining and I will do whatever the hell you want" moments.  I promised him a hike up a mountain.

Fortunately, two year olds don't know the difference between mountains and hills.  So we walked up the slight incline in the woods behind our house.  Ben was thrilled.

Since it is now technically hunting season, and I happen to like my child alive, we made him wear a "magic" hat during our walk.  I'm fairly confident no one actually hunts on the road behind my house, and we were making enough noise to scare off every living creature in a five mile radius, but just to be safe, Ben got to wear his dad's orange hunting hat.

It's a tad large.
So we left for our "hike" with Dad and dog in tow.  Don got dressed up in all his hiking gear.
That's right.  Slippers and pajamas.  It was a pretty intense "hike."  After a few minutes of walking through the woods we discovered we were being followed by some local wildlife.

Yup, that's our cat Scout.  Now that she's an outdoor cat she decided she'd join us on our walk.  Which was pretty hilarious and cute because she followed Ben around.  Unfortunately, she felt the need to complain the whole time.  Seriously Scout, it was barely a hill, not sure why you needed to complain.
How does a cat complain you might be wondering?  Well, it sounds like this:
The whole damn time we walked!
Following the leader!
Someone was getting tired of his hat!

The leaves are starting to get pretty!
And because she wasn't getting in enough of the's Scout crashing the picture of Don and Max
We had a really nice walk, despite the serenade from the cat, and I think we'll try it again next week when maybe a few more leaves have changed colors.  I think we'll probably invest in a bit more orange too, you can't be too safe when it comes to hunting season.  And we'll probably leave the cat in the house.  She really was annoying.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Where Has the Time Gone??

Yesssss!  I found a minute to blog!  I think I have roughly three minutes before Ben wakes up from his nap, and I'm giving myself a well deserved break from reading for my computer class (the book actually explains how to click the mouse, and has separate "lessons" on the complexities of "double clicking" and "right-mouse click").

Things have been kind of nutty around here lately!  Lots of changes at both jobs have had me picking up extra hours each week and have left me pretty tired.  Oh, and did I mention SCHOOL started?  So on top of being worn out from work I'm trying to squeeze studying in to every spare second of time.  And when you have two year old, "spare time" is relatively unheard of.

I'm expecting some more job related changes to come soon.  I haven't exactly decided what those changes will be, but hopefully whatever I decide to do will be the best situation for all of us.  Trying to figure out that situation has left me a little stressed though.  Why must everything change all at once?!?

Fortunately I have a pretty amazing husband who has been picking up a lot of my slack, including taking several work-from-home days so that I could pick up these extra shifts.  I'm so glad he's around to keep everyone fed and clean when I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off.

I also have a pretty amazing two year old who has very successfully, and quickly might I add, potty trained himself!  It was almost over night and he has had very few accidents since we decided to go (almost) diaper free.  We are still struggling a little with using the potty EVERY time at daycare, but hopefully as he gets more comfortable that will all fall into place as well.  Yay for Ben!  Big boys pee on the potty, just ask him, he'll tell you!

The big boys are busy right now too!  Jake has moved to Orono with some friends to get a little taste of the "real world."  With a little luck he'll figure things out quickly, get himself enrolled in school, and move seamlessly into adulthood.  But, there's always a bed here for him should things get off to a rough start.

Marcus started his final year of high school.  WE MADE IT!!!!  I love Marcus dearly, but it has been a long road getting that kid through school!  He's got a really great attitude about things this year and is taking a night class at YCCC in Criminal Law that I hope he finds interesting.  If he can stay focused he's going to have a really great senior year!

It's funny, now that I'm struggling to find spare seconds to blog, I find that I have had all sorts of things to share!  When I had all the time in the world, not a thing would pop into my head.  Oh well, I suppose that's life.

I can hear Ben waking up, thankfully he gave me a nice fifteen minutes or so to write uninterrupted!  We're heading out to explore a little river in Limington now, because we've been severely lacking in Mom and Ben time.  Hopefully he'll have fun splashing around!

Thursday, August 30, 2012


In the last week my kid has totally figured out this "potty" thing.  I'm very excited.  Today he went the entire day in underpants without a single accident.  Sure we may have had to sit on the potty every ten minutes with "false" alarms, but we have made some pretty serious progress from pooping on the floor last weekend.

Yeah, that's right.  Poop.  On the floor.  Gross.

This morning he woke me up, with a dry diaper might I add, so he could pee on the potty.  He then proceeded to make it to the potty every time he had to go.  He even woke up from his nap with a dry diaper.  Yeeeesssssss!!!!!

I am so ready to be done with diapers!  And I know, one day doesn't mean he's potty trained, but it is definitely a good sign!  So good, that I ordered him a new train for his train set if he can keep this up through the weekend.  (Talking Spencer!  "Bust my buffers"!!!)  I'm so proud of him!

So how did I do it?  Bribery.  M&Ms every time he goes on the potty.  He's having so much fun deciding which color he gets each time.  The only problem is that I'm pretty sure he doesn't pee this often when he's wearing a diaper...he might have already discovered how to manipulate me for candy...

Oh well.  I didn't have to change any diapers today, so I'm kind of ok with that.

Friday, August 24, 2012

What Was I Thinking??

I think I have bitten off more than I can chew.  Now that summer is nearly over and school is about to start, I'm having panic attacks that I have signed up for more than I can handle for the next few months.

As it stands right now, I'm working nearly 40 hours a week.  I'm actually really enjoying this schedule, since I can still be home all day with my son four days a week.  We get to spend time together and we can focus on learning things, like how to pee on the potty, that take some time.  I love my new job in Portland, despite the fact that my gas bill in the new Subaru is a bit high (oops!).  I love my waitressing job at night too.  I love the people there and the excitement.  (The money doesn't hurt either!)

Things are just about perfect right now.  But, in less than two weeks I start school.  Full time.  What was I thinking???  Don't get me wrong, I'm really excited to be going and I think this degree is going to be a great thing to add to my resume, but I'm terrified that I won't be able to keep up with my classes and my two jobs.  The last time I was in college was I was working nearly 60 hours a week at the cookie shop with my mom.  I still managed to make it through with more than respectable grades.  I know it WAS possible for me once.  But I didn't have a kid then.  And I'm not sure how I'm going to handle having study time cut into my Ben time.

The closer it gets to labor day, the more nervous I become.  Can I really do this?  Am I going to be ok not spending as much time with Ben?  Is Ben going to be ok not spending as much time with me?  Am I going to find enough hours in the day to get everything done?

I just don't know.

But I do know this....even if it's miserable, it'll be over by December.  And I can make changes to my school and work schedules then to make things more bearable.  I also know that I still have this weekend and all of next week to spend as much time as I can stand with my kid.  So, with that said, I'm off to the lake!

Friday, August 17, 2012

Little Sis is home!

It has been a very busy couple of days.  Well, busy week, really.  I could probably write a bazillion things about everyone I have seen and the fun I've had, but I'm tired.  Like I said, it's been really busy!

So instead, I'll just say this:

My sister is home.  I haven't seen her in a year and a half.  When she called to tell me she was engaged I was so excited for her.  When someone asked me if that meant I would be picking out a bridesmaid's dress, I was stumped.  I love my sister, and I know she loves me, but we're not close in a cuddly, talk on the phone for hours, share every detail of our day, kind of way.  We're just not.  So I wasn't sure she'd want me in the wedding.  She has friends, lots of close friends, and while she was in my wedding, I didn't want to just assume that I would be included in hers.

Instead of asking me to be in her wedding, she told me point blank that I'd better start working on my speech, because Mark's brother is making one and I have to make one too, and since I'm in the wedding, I'd better be prepared.

Which made me very, very happy.  And just a little bit pissed with Mark for wanting to have a wedding with speeches.  (Public speaking?  Yuck.  Mark you suck.)

So it's been really great seeing my sister, and while we still aren't huggy-cuddly-talk on the phone all day-sisters, I'm still having a great time talking with her, watching her play with my son and just having her around.

So while I might be flying to Utah to make a speech at her wedding against my will, I will be doing it in a bridesmaid's dress, and I'm pretty excited about that!

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Yakity Yak

I think my kid talks too much.

We took the cat to the vets today to get a check up and some shots after her foray in the wild.  We walked in the door and Ben became motor mouth. 

"Mom, I sit here.  Mom, now I sit here.  Mom, I read this book.  Mom, that toy scares me.  Mom, that cat napping.  Mom, that a chicken."  Yak, yak, yak.  One of the ladies behind the desk commented on how well he speaks for his age.  She's right, he speaks really well; and an awful lot.

When we went in to the exam room it didn't stop.

"Mom, what Scoutie doing?  Why Scoutie scared?  I count the cats?  Mom, I count the cats again? "

Even when trying to talk to the vet about what happened to Scout and which vaccines to get her now.

"Mom, that a hole in the wall?  What that hole doing?  Mom, I sit up here now?  Mom, I open that door?"


And in the middle of the administering of Scout's shots, Ben (loudly) announced that he could see "Scoutie's Bum."

And now I know my mother got what she wished for.  I have a kid that's just like me....

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Mumford & Me

Yesterday was the first concert I have ever attended that was sponsored by mustaches.  (And might I say, well done mustachios, well done.)

Tickets and Mustaches we scored at the Gates

Don and I went to see the first Gentlemen of the Road Stopover, in Portland.  Since we knew there were going to be 12,000+ people at this event, and had little desire to be smooshed into a crowd of 12,000 sweating bodies in August, we elected to arrive a little late.  So at 2:30 we arrived by train (that's right, train) at the festival on the Eastern Prom.  (There was NO parking in Portland's east end, so we parked by the Civic Center and walked to the Narrow Gauge Railway where they were offering free train rides up the hill to the concert.  Score!)  Since we were late there wasn't much of a line to get in.  Having read all the info released prior to the show about what to bring, and what not to bring we thought we were all set.  Wrong.  Apparently even UNOPENED brand new bottles of water were not allowed.  So we had to dump our water at the gate and were told to refill when we got inside.  Stupid.  Seriously stupid.  Especially since there was ONE water refill station for the said 12,000+ people at the show.  Uggggh.  Fortunately we settled ourselves near the Beer tent where they were selling expensive, yet delicious, beer and water.  We stayed hydrated.

Portland Stopover

The Gentlemen

There were two stages at the bottom of the hill and since we sat at the very top of the hill we had an AMAZING view of the harbor and both stages.  The people singing on the stages looked like ants, but you could hear them just fine, and that was really all that mattered.  While our spots at the back may not have given us great views of the performers, we still were able to see and we were in the shade and there were less people, and we were near the beer, so really, it all worked out.

View from our spot-yup, we were FAR away!

There were so many people, you can't even see half of them in these pictures, it was crazy!

The music was really good.  I hadn't heard any of the bands before, aside from the headlining Mumford & Sons and the last minute addition Dropkick Murphys.  I was pretty confident that the bands would all be of a similar style and they were, which made it really enjoyable.  Despite being quite far from the stages, it was really nice to listen to and watch.  It was a long afternoon, but with the help of some beer and people watching, even Don agreed that it passed pretty quickly.

The Dropkick Murphys went on stage for a couple of songs right before Mumford & Sons and they were REALLY good.  Unfortunately their sound was a little on the quiet side, so it was kind of hard to hear.  Fortunately we were planning on seeing them after Mumford & Sons at the State Theater, so we weren't too upset.

Dropkick Murphys (my camera was on SUPER zoom here!)

Then Mumford & Sons took the stage and they were really, really good.  Really good.  They played a lot from their current cd and several from the new one that comes out next month.  (Can't wait for that one, judging by the songs they played for us at the show it's going to be amazing!)  Great sound, great performers, great crowd, just great!  They were really happy to be playing in Portland and were planning on spending several days in the city, which I think is pretty cool for a pretty big time band like that.  They really wanted everyone there to support the city and go out and enjoy it after the show.  (Good news for Portland since there were 12,000 people hanging onto their every word!)


They were so good!

A Blurry picture of us while Mumford & Sons were performing.  Not very flattering...

After Mumford's encore, they invited all the other bands that had performed to come up and sing with them for one last song.  (Spoiler:  It was The Band's The Weight)  Pretty damn cool!  Then there were fireworks over the water, again, damn cool.  We had actually just walked out of the venue when they started the fireworks, so we saw them from the street, and there were a whole bunch of kids running around the neighborhood loving the fireworks and loving that there wasn't any traffic, that was pretty sweet to watch too.  :)

We beelined it down Congress Street in search of food.  (Like water, food involved outrageously long lines and we weren't allowed to bring ANYTHING in to snack on.  So we went without.  Stupid Rule.)  We snagged a couple of sandwiches at Bingas quickly and were able to get out of there just as they were filling up with starving concert goers.

By this point, we were exhausted.  We are not partiers by nature and the long day of events left us pretty much exhausted by 10:30.  BUT, we had tickets to the Dropkick Murphys show that started at 10:30.  So off we went!  The Murphys didn't actually go onstage until nearly 11:30.  And I'll admit it, Don and I were practically asleep in our seats.  Yup, we're old fuddy-duddys.  Once they started playing we both perked up and enjoyed the first half of their set.  They are so good, and so energetic.  And it's not often you can say you saw someone totally rock out on the banjo...but last night, I did!

Unfortunately, we couldn't make it through the whole show.  We were both exhausted, I had a POUNDING headache, and we had an hour long drive home to look forward to.  Reluctantly we left the show and dragged our exhausted butts home.  I think we were both asleep within 3 minutes of our heads hitting the pillows....zzzzzzz.

What an amazing day though!  The bands were great and I just couldn't get over how perfect the Eastern Prom worked for the concert!  I REALLY hope Portland takes a hint and plans more shows like that!  And despite learning that we are perhaps not the type to live up the night life to its fullest, I had a really great day with my husband celebrating our anniversary a few days early.  Seven years of marriage, seven hours of music...nice.

And I got a fake mustache.  Sweet....

Anniversary Celebration!!

(and yes we were near the port-a-potties, fortunately there was plenty of cigarette and weed smoke to cover the smell...and give us a slight buzz....)

Monday, July 30, 2012

And Out Goes July...

Man, I've been a lazy blogger this month.  Good thing I can blame it on the beautiful weather and all the fun things I've been doing this month!  Here are a few updates from the month of July:

Work:  This week will be the first week of what I hope is my permanent schedule. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday in Portland at my new job, and then Thursday and Saturday nights at the Restaurant.  I'm really looking forward to this change as it puts me home with my little guy all day Thursdays-Sundays.  The chopped up schedule we were doing wasn't working.  And while this does mean that I will now be working about 36 hours a week, I can't tell you how happy I am that I can still be home with my little guy four days a week.  Not sure I could get a better arrangement if I tried.

School:  I bought a backpack.  That's right a new backpack.  I'm ready to go.  Well, once I buy a gazillion dollars worth of books.  Blah!  Must they be so expensive??  I got my bill for the semester and after my loans are applied I only owe the school $23.  Not too shabby.  I'm really excited to get back to school, but pretty terrified at the prospect of working 36 hours and being a full time student...and a full time mom!  Worse case scenario I'll just back off a bit at one of my jobs, but hopefully getting back into school will be like riding a bike and things will be easier than I'm expecting.  Fingers and toes are crossed.

Pets:  Well, we are still missing Scout the cat.  She's been gone well over two weeks now, and I'm not very optimistic.  She was a wonderful cat and I really hope she makes her way back here, but I'm beginning to think it's rather unlikely.  The other cat, Leonard, seems to be adjusting well; Scout was a bit of a pig so Leonard has been kind of amazed at the amount of food he's able to eat without Scout devouring every bite before he can get a mouthful.  He'll be tubby before I know it!  And, perhaps the best news of the month, a good friend of mine saw Ivy at a local pet store and stopped to talk to her new owner.  I can't believe how fortunate I am that I'm able to get a follow up report on her adoption!  Her new home is with an older lady, so there won't be any kids around, who is a volunteer at AWS.  She fell in love with Ivy while she was at the shelter and brought her home.  Ivy was very well behaved with this new owner and I am so relieved to know that she will be well taken care of.  And yes, I will probably be poking my head in at this local pet shop every now and again on the off chance that she is there on a shopping spree. :)

Ben:  I have the best kid ever.  Seriously.  He's amazing.  He's smart and friendly and talkative and becoming quite the little comedian.  It has been amazing to watch his imagination take off!  A few days ago, while playing on my bed, he told me that there were sharks coming.  Apparently, these sharks were going to get Papa's boat (my dad has a lobster boat) and he needed to save Papa.  He proudly announced that he had caught two sharks and that Papa was ok now.  How awesome is that!  He's been a trooper with me going back to work, and while I know he loves the extra time he has been spending with his grandmother and with Ms. Holly, I also notice how much more he enjoys our days together at home.  What used to be regular days have become Mom and Ben special days, and I think we are both loving it.

August:  Is going to rock.  It's going to kick off with MUMFORD & SONS in Portland followed by THE DROPKICK MURPHYS!  Yahoooo!  I'm so excited for this once in a lifetime event!  Seriously, they are only doing 4 of these shows in the US.  And I'm going to one!  Then it's our 7 Year Wedding Anniversary!  (The Copper or Wool Anniversary.  Phew.  Pretty romantic if you ask me.)  After that a birthday party for a friend of mine who is turning....well, I'm not going to say...she might read this...  :)  And after that.....MY SISTER COMES HOME!!!!  I haven't seen her in a year and a half.  I'm SO EXCITED to see her.  SO EXCITED.  Like jumping up and down excited.  We've got a bunch of stuff to do while she's home, but she has made a point to schedule a lot of time with Ben and I and I am so excited for her to get to know him and for him to get to know her.  Yay for family time.  Like I said...August is going to ROCK!

And that is my update Blog!  Phew!  I need to keep up with my blog so I don't have to do this all at once!

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Because I wanted to be an Astronaut

There just aren't enough hours in a day for me to keep up with my blogging!

A few days ago, Sally Ride, the first female American astronaut, passed away.  Maybe you've heard of her.  Maybe you haven't.  I probably wouldn't have heard of her, except that between the ages of seven and ten, I wanted to be an astronaut.  I was given a photo of her and told that she was the first woman in space.  That's all I knew about her.  Seriously.  But that was enough.  Coupled with my love of the movie "Space Camp" about a group of kids at Space Camp who actually ended up in space, (FYI: All Star cast on that one!  Yikes!  Bet those actors are still haunted by that...) I was pretty sure I was going to be an astronaut.

I know for a fact my mom completely supported me on that.  Likely she thought space a nice alternative to having me underfoot all the time.  Like many childhood dreams, this one fizzled out.  I'm a book girl, not a science girl.  But, when I heard about the passing of Sally Ride, I was a little saddened about never making it to space.  I read a few articles about her and all the amazing things she has done within the space program and through her own company, Sally Ride Science, to encourage young girls to study science and math.  What an inspiration! Here are a few nice things I found while reading about her today:

Sally lived her life to the fullest, with boundless energy, curiosity, intelligence, passion, commitment, and love. Her integrity was absolute; her spirit was immeasurable; her approach to life was fearless.
Sally was a physicist, the first American woman to fly in space, a science writer, and the President and CEO of Sally Ride Science. She had the rare ability to understand the essence of things and to inspire those around her to join her pursuits.     -Sally Ride Science, Company Statement

Sally was a very private person who found herself a very public persona. It was a role in which she was never fully comfortable. I was privileged to be a part of her life and be in a position to support her as she became the first American woman to fly in space.
While she never enjoyed being a celebrity, she recognized that it gave her the opportunity to encourage children, particularly young girls, to reach their full potential. Sally Ride, the astronaut and the person, allowed many young girls across the world to believe they could achieve anything if they studied and worked hard. I think she would be pleased with that legacy.   -Steve Hawley, Former NASA astronaut, ex-husband (married to Ride from 1982 to 1987)

Sally Ride broke barriers with grace and professionalism — and literally changed the face of America's space program. The nation has lost one of its finest leaders, teachers and explorers. Our thoughts and prayers are with Sally's family and the many she inspired. She will be missed, but her star will always shine brightly.     -Charles Bolden, NASA Administrator

And while I never made it to space, or Space Camp, or even into the field of Science, I still wanted to take a minute to remember Ms. Ride for being an inspiration to me, before I knew what inspirations were.

This is the same picture I had of her when I was a kid!

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

A Bit of a Funk

I'm not having a great week.  And it's only Tuesday.

We had an excellent weekend, but thanks to a few irresponsible moves by my teenage stepson, the highlights were overshadowed by some pretty unfortunate events, one of them being that my indoor cat ran away and hasn't been seen since.  I called the shelter today and left my contact information, but she hasn't been dropped off there.  I've heard lots of stories about cats running away for weeks before making their way home, so I'm not giving up hope quite yet, but I'm also not terribly optimistic.

I'm also still not fully adjusted to working in Portland part-time.  It's proving to be a lot harder for me to be away from Ben than I thought.  I really like my job though, I'm just having a hard time getting into a rhythm due to the chopped up way my weeks have been shaping up, and I know it's rough for Ben too, which makes me feel even worse about the situation.

Hopefully having the day off tomorrow will help.  If the weather cooperates I'd like to take Ben berry picking.  Berries and whipped cream is one of his favorite snacks and I'd love to spend some one-on-one with him.  Unfortunately, I also have a mountain of paperwork to do too, but I think that's just going to have to wait until Thursday.  If I'm going to get my week straightened out and on the right track, I think I need a little time with Ben.  I hope he's up for spending some time with Mom!

Cheese Face!
(It's pretty much impossible not to miss this guy!)

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Read It: The Night Circus

I'm beat.  Working two jobs that operate on two different schedules is leaving me exhausted.  But I'm loving it, so I guess I just need to start going to bed a little earlier.  Now if only Ben would sleep in a little later....

I'm writing tonight to announce that I finished The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern.  It was excellent!!!  Wonderful storyline, wonderful characters, wonderful concept, and AMAZING description.  A really great read, a book that really just paints beautiful pictures, which is even more impressive a feat when the majority of the book takes place in a Circus that is designed to be only black and white.  If you're looking for something fun for the summer that is a bit more thought provoking than Fifty Shades, I suggest you pick up a copy!

I would like to write more, but I seem to be losing my ability to type as a result of being so damn tired.  Bed for me!  After I fold the laundry...and rinse the dishes....and pack my bags for the weekend.


Sunday, July 8, 2012

The Ride Home

On Tuesday I spent my whole morning working hard to learn my new job.  I spent the afternoon diligently working as well.  But, when 4:30 rolled around, I started getting anxious.  Not because the next day was my day off, not because the next day was the Fourth of July, but because I missed my kid.

At five o'clock I flew out the door, tried to find the quickest way out of Portland (still looking) and headed home.  I really wanted to see my kid.

When I made the turn onto the Dole's Ridge Road (about 12 minutes from home) I found myself getting impatient.  My speed kept creeping up until I was way over the speed limit.  I tried to keep it in check, but I missed my kid.

As I turned onto the New Dam Road (about 5 minutes from home) I felt such frustration that I wasn't there yet.  I just wanted my kid.  I thought to myself, "Does this ever go away?  This longing for your child when you haven't seen them all day?"  But I quickly realized, I don't think I ever want it to go away.  Missing your kid so much it hurts really isn't fun.  But having such a wonderful kid to miss so much makes me a very lucky lady. 

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

My Garden Rocks!

I'm just going to take a little minute here and brag about how AMAZING my garden looks this year.  This year I started my own seeds in the house in the beginning of May.  I got them in the ground on Mother's Day, which is about a month ahead of last years schedule.  And I think it has made a HUGE difference!

Zucchini Blossoms!

Cucumbers, Zucchini and Herbs with a little baby lettuce in the way back

These are the tomatoes in the front with Strawberries, Green Beans and Peas in the background.

Blossoms on the Peas

Baby Green Beans!

These pictures were actually ones from last weekend, I've had a bunch of zucchini flowers and the cucumbers have had blossoms too.  The green beans will be big enough to start eating probably once the sun comes out again, and today I saw some peas on the vine big enough to eat too!  And it's not even July yet!!!

These plants are all doing awesome this year and I definitely learned my lesson about starting seeds very early!  If I'm lucky I might even get to plant a second run of a few things, like Beans and lettuce.  We'll see!

And here's a few shots of Ben and his cousin Summer playing in the lake last weekend:

Yay for warm weather!!!

Sunday, June 24, 2012

Tomorrow's the Day

So tomorrow is the big day.  I start a good ol' nine-to-five job again.  Granted it's only going to be a couple of days a week, but it's still a pretty big deal.

Overall, I'm pretty excited.  I'm excited for this opportunity to start using my brain for something other than changing diapers and serving beer.  I'm excited that I get to work in Portland again, even though it's a long commute.  I loved working in the city and have missed being there for the last couple of years.  I'm excited that Ben will be spending more time with his Gram this summer and more time with Ms. Holly and his friends at daycare.  The socialization has been wonderful for Ben and I'm seeing him grow and understand things in amazing ways.  Hopefully with a little more constructive learning he will start picking up some of the other skills he's missing, like counting and learning letters.

So like I said, overall, I'm pretty excited about this.  But, of course, I'm a mom going back to work, and I wouldn't be a mom if I didn't worry.  Am I making the right decision?  Is it too soon to be leaving Ben, even if it is only a few days a week?  Will I regret this later on?  Will I wish that I had spent more time with him?  I've been blessed to have two and a half years with him all day, every day.  I was able to be there for his first smile, sitting up for the first time, first time crawling, first steps, first words.  How lucky was I?  But am I ready to start missing things?  First time telling a joke, first time asking to use the potty, first time writing his letters, saying his ABCs?

"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." -Elizabeth Stone

Tomorrow is the beginning of my little heart walking around without me by his side.  And while I'm excited for my new opportunity, I'm a little broken hearted that I have to leave him. 

So wish me luck, and feel free to remind me that this will get easier...

Love my little guy...

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Book Club

Hmmmmm, what do you take for food to your new book club when they are reading Fifty Shades of Grey???....hmmmmmmm......

Why BDS'Mores Brownies and Vanilla Brownies!  Of Course!

Just a little something I "whipped" up yesterday afternoon....